Growing Forward

My time in Honduras, as was known from the get go, has led to growth in every area of my life. Personally, I have had the opportunity to meet new people, get to know myself in different ways, and the explore possibilities. I have been challenged, faced financial responsibility, and learned to ways to get along with roommates. Spiritually, I have seen how another culture worships, and gotten closer to finding the ways that I am most comfortable communing with God. Professionally, I am learning to teach and getting experience that can lead to better schools and better career options in the future.

Learning Spanish has always been on my to-do list. One, just because I hate to have failed at it. That grates at me. It also makes me a better world citizen and a better American citizen as more and more of our population is becoming Hispanic. It's a useful skill for me, as so much of the world does speak Spanish, and it's useful for other people. It also opens up some professional doors for later on, should I decide to work in the States, I could easily get ESL certified and already have that kind of experience under my belt.

I can also break out of my “Bachelorette Meal of the Month” routine and actually cook, which I've started here at home. As a way to not leech off my parents (not that they make me feel like a leech, I just don't want to mooch) I have been cooking just about every night. Some of the recipes are ones I have done before, but most are new to both me and my folks. Some of the recipes are manageable in Honduras, some will have to be amended, and some are simply not going to be done.

I've collected my family's recipes, recipes from people I met in Copan, local recipes, and recipes from online. I've been cooking things I'd never tried before, from the incredibly simple (rice) to much more complicated things. I'm even pickling things! The best part, to me, is that I'm enjoying these experiments and find myself disappointed when I'm not able to cook for the night. I hope to plan out my meals for the week and shop accordingly in advance next year.

After it got out that I was staying another year, I found a real connection with people I had thought I was already connected to. Many of the parents and other members of the Mayatan community seem to stay at least a little guarded to us until they know that we're invested in them, in more than just an experience. I also talked with some of the girls at the school and a couple of my students' moms and expressed my shyness with speaking Spanish is not a lack of desire to speak with them nor, really, an inability. Some of them started to try to help pull me out of that shell and I hope to continue the trend when I return.

In the coming year, I will be living on my own. This will force me to break out of my tendency to hermit away in my house after school. As the teacher who knows the town and community, I can be the leader in helping them around, giving me an opportunity to start out with great connections to all the other teachers.

Personal growth is not really something you can plan. You can put yourself in a position to change, but you never really know how the end result will look. I never planned to stay another year, and I never planned to change the whole direction of my future, but now I can't imagine living in the United States in the future. I also can't imagine NOT living in the United States in the future. It's a strange place to be in. But this is where I am after year one. I'd venture to say I'm a healthier, happier person than when I went down and now I have the opportunity to continue my growth, and add the new element of living alone for the first time in my life.