Week 27: Losing Jose

Day 182 February 6
I woke up, of course, at 4:30, but put in ear plugs and went back to sleep. I next woke up at 9:30, which was glorious. Jose heard me get up, and though I had gotten back into bed, he popped upstairs and we chatted for a while before I showed and got ready to go to the market. The boy does think I’m rich these days (maybe because I just bought a bunch of his jewelry and then bought him a pair of pants) but I am trying to show him that I live on a certain amount during a week and when I run out…I’m out.
We went to the market together, and all I had was my week’s allowance after buying him pants. I managed to get my food for the week and a couple treats (grapes, avocados). I saw several other teachers, Honduran and foreign, and some parents in the market, which made it quite the social outing. Maybe I’ll start doing my shopping on Saturday and not Sunday from now on. Also, one of my parents now has a booth in the new market, and I bought some things from her (she also gave me one free vegetable to try.)
Jose and I went home where I made up a grilled cheese sandwich with onion and Jose made chismol and tortillas with (my) quesillo, but he made two for me also and they were delicious. I then made hummus for the first time in my life (too watery) and made cucumbers (I just struggled to remember the English word for cucumbers) in vinegar for Beth’s lunch-party. She’s 30 today! Happy Birthday Beth!
Also, you can tell I’m feeling better because I have started writing way more. I think when I’m sick and/or busy I stop caring about the day-to-day details and when I’m feeling good, everything excites me.
Abby, Allan, and I left late for the party, so we went to Tuk-tuk corner to grab a cab, where we were, predictably, assaulted by 20 cab drivers all convinced we should get in their cab. Allan and I were just going to head for the closest one when we realized there was a man among them we knew, so we followed him to the very end of the line to get in his cab, while all the other drivers made their upset comments.
On the way up the hill we saw Michael and Eileen walking, and Allan asked the driver to drive really close so he could smack him on the rear. He did, and Michael punched him in the arm before realizing what was going on. His face was angry, but by the time he got up the hill, he figured out what had happened and was amused. It was hilarious. I laughed the rest of the way up. And as I retold the story to several folks.
Brunch was lovely, the food was well received, and the conversation was good. We hung out for several hours before parting ways to plan a surprise party for the evening. On the way down, we stopped by the library so the other teachers could look around. I also noticed the book exchange which had a take a book, leave a book +20 lemps policy. I love knowing that it is there. They do have books in English.
I got home and cleaned the kitchen and picked up my room. After a bit, I grabbed my computer to go to Villamil and I had a long and lovely talk with my folks.
I got home and cooked up dinner while Abby and Allan were finishing up their cooking. We ate and left for the surprise party for Beth. However, when we got to the street, we heard a voice behind us calling us. It was Beth and her friend Elizabeth. They were on their scavenger hunt around town, with various gifts and clues for where to go next. However, no one was expecting a party to be happening at Guacamaya. The note had disappeared and several 16 year old boys were standing on the porch now, leering. We investigated with her, found one of our friends and asked if he knew where the note was. In his current state, it took us a while to get him understanding and motivated enough to get the note for us. He did, thanked him for his offer of ron (rum) and continued on our way. I was really glad to see Beth was enjoying everything that had been planned for her.
We made our way to the next spot, which was closed, so Abby, who happened to know the clue (but, of course didn’t know who the “amigos secretos” were who put the hunt together) verbally delivered the message. We went up to Bar Cito for a few minutes, danced for maybe 1 minutes, gathered up Eileen who was waiting there, and moved on to ViaVia where the big surprise waited. Beth received her last clue and a bottle of tequila from the bar tender there and we moved on to the boys’ house, where we could see them on the roof with a bon fire when we arrived. All in all, it went well according to plan, and what didn’t worked itself out nicely and hilariously.
The boys had a video of the Talking Heads being projected onto the wall, and there was dancing to be had. Eventually we made our way to the roof. Many good conversations were had (Alex will now admit to 62.3% chance of staying, and Michael has moved up from a 10% chance, to a 35% chance.) There was cake, guitar, Spanish Christmas carols (because we’re all still scarred from all those practice sessions), The Fox, and fire crackers. Fire crackers are loud and obnoxious, and a perfectly Honduran thing to set off in the middle of the night if you’re celebrating. It just makes me so thankful, again, that the houses are all made of concrete.
There was pin the tail on the borro and a piñata downstairs, which had been waiting patiently. The move off the roof lead to a variety of hilarious, and potentially risky endeavors, including putting the last firework, which had no fuse, into the fire as everyone left and therefore “no risk” of anyone getting hurt, and, as we were climbing down right beside the boys pila, someone accidentally broke the spicket…off. Which left the water just running, with no way to stop it. The pila began to overflow all over the floor and various attempts to plug it with corks and candles just got shot out in a matter of seconds.
The firework put in the fire just caught fire and most folks had forgotten about it before the first minor explosion, and then within a minute the bigger, but still not horrible explosion occurred. Within the hour, the spicket had been plugged with a cork and tightened and held in with a variety of things. The landlord would be called in the morning and it had been broken more in order to manage it now. We’ll see how that works out.
The piñata became piñata vs. machete, and the machete won. Everyone stayed clear. And Theo, who was in charge of the rope, was on the roof. Beth was the only one who got to play piñata vs. machete, as the rope broke, and then it was beaten on the ground. A variety of candy, soccer player stickers, and alcohol fell out of the piñata. The group then made a move to head to a bar, and I decided to head to bed. I had thought of leaving several times, but simply needed to see how everything resolved itself and had kept myself up, sin caffeine, until 1:30.
On my walk home I saw one of my waiter friends from the restaurant on the corner. He was surprised to see me out, and I explained I had been at a birthday party. He then asked if I gave English classes, which confused me, and after a few repeats and clarifications, I realized he meant to adults. I said that I could and asked if he wanted classes. He said that he wants to learn many things. Despite all of our greetings during every day, we didn’t know each other’s names, so Jose and I introduced ourselves and bid each other very happy nights.

Day 183 February 7
I actually got chilly in the night, but then woke up too warm. I set to cooking, cleaning, and laundry (it may sound mundane every time I write it, but I find it a lovely start to the day, so long as I have the time.) Jose came home at 10, but had left his keys wherever he stayed last night, so he left again and said he’d be back in an hour. He was not, and I hope he got in later because I left with my food and went to worship at Megan’s house.
We’ve been getting slower and having more discussion, which is nice. Today we listened to the third in a series of sermons we’ve been listening to and discussed the idea of modern day prophets and how they may or may not manifest themselves. And though this man apparently predicted the big earthquake in May, his February 7, 2010 prediction did not come to fruition.
After church I spent a good bit of time doing work in my room and chatting with Jose before I decided I did want to go to Pizza Copan with everyone to watch the game. I tried to explain to Jose why every gringo in town was there, but he kept trying to figure out which team was the US. Both. I think he settled on the Saints, because it was the team I was cheering for.
I brought some work and worked some while there, but there was good camaraderie and good fun. I left before the end because I was tired, but ended up being up late anyway because I got to talking to Luis and later with Jose. Finally at 10:30 I turned in.

Day 184 February 8
I didn’t sleep very well, but the morning wasn’t as hard as I expected it to be. I briefly met the new vigilante, and we had to get the coffee started, because he hasn’t yet learned how much we love our coffee in the morning. Hopefully tomorrow.
My recess and Lunch are now 5 minutes long because I was asked to tutor a student for his recoup exams during that time. The tests are this week, so it’s only for this week, but it’s more draining than I expected.
The kids were a little chatty, but over all we had a good day. The hardest thing now is getting kids out when I’m trying to tutor other kids. Even once I get them out of the room, I’m constantly chasing kids out of the hallway, where they are very noisy. It’s hard enough to get kids to focus during tutorias anyway.
I stayed after school to work and do my homework. As usual, I was accompanied by Victor and Marlon who stay in hopes of candy and to play with my transformers. I did explain that I’m much more inclined to give them candy if they don’t ask. We’ll see how it works out.
I walked home with Beth and continued on a research quest I am on that I started at school (saving web pages to the computer to read later.) Jose was getting ready for his first day of school (he’s taking night classes) and we were all excited. I wasn’t actually there for the send off because I had class, but I gave him a big hug before I left.
Class went well, and then I got home to cook dinner (a nothing-like-how-mom-makes-and-i-wish-it-was hard-boiled egg salad). It was tasty enough.
Sierra came in and was waiting for Jose to get back from class so they could go watch Avatar at Caroline’s, but he was late. She left without him and so when he came in a few minutes later I only had a moment to ask him how school was, but he said he liked it a whole lot. I was really excited for him, and then he rushed off.
I continued reading of The Great Book of Amber and finished the third book, entering into the fourth. Then I found sleep.
Unfortunately, this morning I discovered that Jose stole from me. I really wanted to find another explanation, but unfortunately, this time, I don’t have too much doubt in my memory. I have some, based on I didn’t actually see it happen. Friday, when Marlon came over, he had the 50 lemps and the tickets for the raffle, he was so excited and emptied his wallet for me. I counted it, saw some was missing and he dug in further to get the rest for me. I didn’t want to lose it, so I got a plastic, clear, baggie and put the tickets and the money in the bag. I then put the bag in the drawer less space on the nightstand next to my bed. It is visible. During the weekend, Jose spent a lot of time with me in my room, as Sierra wasn’t around. Saturday, I know he asked for 20 lemps, and I said I didn’t have it. And I didn’t. Sunday night I put the bag in my backpack and on Monday I counted it at school: 22 of 50 lemps. I retraced my thoughts, tried to figure the probability of my making a mistake. Of course there is some.

Day 185 February 9
I decided I would ask Marlon if he had given me all of the money or if he had found any extra money in his wallet. He said I had it all. That had been my best last hope. It’s not that the amount was a lot. It’s trust. This kid has access to everything we have. I’m inclined to forgive and let live, just with a firmer hand and if it happens again, he’s out.I think his behavior, up until now, has been perfectly normal and expected for his age and circumstance. Stealing is a line though, and it’s Sierra’s house too, so if he can’t be trusted, we’ll be a united front. I feel torn. I love this boy, but I can’t be a mother to him. The deal was that he would stay here until Josue came back, but now Josue says he won’t take him back. The current idea is that we still want to show him some stability, so we’ll keep him here for the agreed upon time and he’ll have to use that time to find other arrangements. Maybe go back home. I hope he stays in school. I hope it doesn’t hurt him too much.
I think of it like an adopted kid who’s been through a lot. They act out until they believe they can really trust you. They expect to let people down, so they do it deliberately so it’s in their control. They don’t want to be surprised by it. The thing is, we aren’t really his parents. We can’t really commit to him like that, and the risk is great. We also don’t have the means to shower him with what he really does need. And we don’t have the ability to be the authority figures it would take to re-train his mentality. I think sticking to the original plan of one more week is best. Josue’s decision is not in our hands, all we can do is stick to our word and show consistency. I just hope I’m not wrong somehow. But, if I’m going to accuse him, I’m not going to show the doubt I feel. Maybe he’ll hate me for it, but he won’t admit it even if he did. Though, I will give him the chance to.
The morning was slow. I slept in 30 minutes and left 30 minutes late. The nice thing is I leave early enough that 30 minutes late is still early. Whooo!
It’s getting hot, and today the power was out so we had no fans to cool us down. What’s really bad about no power is it means no coffee. I got one cup, went back for another before class but it was out and working on a new pot, by the time I was free to try again, the power had been out for 2:30 hours. Nooooooo! It makes me a little less patient, though not as bad as when I was sick.
I’m revamping my science plans because my current approach is not working. Poor Juan is tired of not having recess, but it’s only one more day and then he’s free to play. I hope he passes at least some of his recoups, but we’ve spent hours on the definitions of and examples for the following three words: noun, verb, adjective and he still can only identify noun if the definition is written somewhere else on the paper (like a matching test.)
Otherwise, tutorias seem to be going well. Though, I was pretty distracted after school. We had a staff meeting after tutorias, and after I forgot I had more tutorias. I was only 10 minutes late (I told him 4, but I usually go at 3:30) and Isaac apparently had not told his mom I said 4 (I couldn’t have made it back even if I had remembered because of the staff meeting) and she called me and so I rushed over. I explained and she seemed fine. He was kind of falling asleep by the end, but he’s doing better.
I got home and wrote a lot.
Not surprisingly things did not stay peachy with Jose staying in the house. Things were dealt with. We had a family meeting and he decided to move out. After it was all over, I tried to sleep, but couldn’t sleep well.

Day 186 February 10
Wednesday was a hectic but productive day at school. It was among the last that I would sacrifice my recesses for tutoring sessions, and from how his tests went, it seems to have been worth it.
I gave exams after school and then headed home. When I got home, Jose was there, talking to Sierra and getting some more things. He wouldn’t really talk to me. I tried to talk to him about it, but no luck.
I went to class and basically spent it as a vent my frustrations in Spanish session. Luis thinks being upset increases my Spanish ability. After class we went for baleadas at Katia’s mom’s place and then we sat in the park to continue the conversation. I had a lot to say.
I got home and went to bed.

Day 187 February 11
Thursdays are usually my tough days, but today’s long morning seemed shorter than usual. It was nice. After school, we had recuperations, and I was supposed to be done, but part way through one, kids came in and said that the last bus to her town was leaving. She had to go, 15 minutes early. It was a pain, and the truth. Sometimes the drivers work on their own schedule. She will finish tomorrow.
I finished up some things for the raffle and then hurried to town for tutoring with Isaac, which was an hour and 45 minutes rather than an hour 15. His mom also wants me to come a third day each week for tutoring not related to school, just to help him practice English. Which, I will begin on Monday.
I was 10 minutes late to class, and as I had not even been home for 12 hours, did not have my notebook or school book. We worked around it.
When I finally did get home, Josue was just coming back from his 3 weeks away and wanted to talk about the situation with Jose. We did until Sierra came home and then Abby left and I went to Villamil, where we had internet troubles. After they bent over backwards to get it up and running again, I chatted and researched for a while. Luis came and sat with me, but we were both in our own little worlds.
I then went home and slept early.

Day 188 February 12
Today is, affectively, Valentine’s Day as far as school is concerned. The secondary students sold roses, cadies, and cards. I ordered a rose in advance and gave it to Miss Megan. My kids got me a variety of candies, roses, and a pair of elephant earrings.
Recess was a mess, because it wasn’t until it was time to come in that they decided to set up a surprise for me. They had the 10th graders, who were playing music as they sold things, play “I Gotta Feeling” by the Black Eyed Peas and they gave me things. Then they all hugged me. It was really sweet and made the 20 minutes of class I did have left before PE impossible (that and we had a lice check, and even though only two kids were out of the room at any given time, they simply could not focus.)
For art we made “Love Bugs” with a poem written on a heart that bounced off the accordioned legs of their bug. (I am a little bug, Sending you a lot of love! Please take a giant hug From this little bug of love.)
Only 4 of my kids had lice, but one of them was a Maria Jose, and the note home only said “Maria Jose.” I asked one of the haciadoras if she knew which girl (because I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it), but she wasn’t sure. She told me to ask Marisol in the office. However Marisol had already left, so I had to have the girls checked again to make sure I sent the note home with the right girl. Poor girls.
I got home and read for a while. Then Sierra got in and we talked for a while, while she cleaned for her room. I went down and cooked up some vegetables before going to Twisted Tanya’s. Right after I got there, Kelvin called asking if I could meet him at my house so he could get his glasses. So, I headed back home. We split the vegetables and then he headed out.
I had been hit by a big bit of sleepy, so I decided to try just to stay up until 8 and then go to sleep. I watched the Big Lebowski and went to sleep.